Red Flags

To my darling oldest,

Being the oldest child come's with certain responsibilities. Therefore, when I am in the kitchen, I should not hear the following conservation take place between you and your brother: "OK N get on your knees and tuck your head under so I don't hurt it. OK, now hold still, I am going to stand on your back"
Please know my son that someday he may be bigger then you and, well, payback honey payback is all I can say.
xoxo Mommy

I have noticed there have been a series of Red Flags in my daily life. A few weeks ago, I hear the above conversation between my sons. I am listening, I hear "tuck your head under" (Red Flag 1),  "hold still" (Red Flag 2), "OK I am going to stand on your back now" (RED FLAG!!) I yell into the other room "What are you doing to your brother?!?"  The mater of fact (with a hint of duh mom) answer "using him for a blast pad" well of course, silly me what else would you use your 4 year old brother for.

I am not sure where boy's seem to learn these things, I have my suspects though:

I should insert a photo of their father here also, he is the one who introduced the kids to this cast of ill behaved cartoon characters but for the sake of my marriage, I will keep his identity hidden (see first blog "Man is he going to be pissed)

So I will resort to blaming my children's behavior on Disney and Boomerang.

Here is a list of the Red Flags that I have encountered this week:

Wet spot on bathroom floor near potty, is it water or pee (when I see the spray on the side of the potty  I have my answer)

Where is your sister? I don't know? (never a good sign to lose track of your 2 year old)

MOMMY!!! (nothing good ever follows)

My tummy hurts (need I say more)

Mommy the dog (enter one of the 100 nasty things our dog does daily that I then have to clean up)

CRASH!

My 6 year old's new vocabulary words (which I am sure will win me an award with the PTA) including Friggin (when corrected on the inappropriateness of this word say's "can I just say The F word", Wuzz Upppp, No you didn't, OOOO my nuts and the ever charming "butt nut".

Honey, I may have a meeting this afternoon (Red Flag for, my children will all lose their minds at 5:00)

Who left the baby gate open??

and perhaps (or not) the most disturbing Red Flag of the week, when we sit down to dinner tonight, my darling almost 2 year old daughter points to my glass and say's "Mommy's wine"

so after a week filled with Red Flags there is only one thing for me to do, raise my own flag

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Any Red Flags at your place this week??