Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Tonight as I was putting my daughter to bed, I thought of 100 other things I “needed” to do. I was anxious to get her into her crib and just have some time with no one touching me, asking me for something yelling to have their needs met NOW. I still rock her to bed (no judging!) but tonight I just wanted to put her in to bed and be done. As I walked her into her room and said good night, I heard the familiar “rock me”. I sat in the rocking chair for a hurried rock and into bed with her. Something came over me tonight, I felt a little tugging on the inside that said, slow down. Savor this, before you know it she will not want to be rocked. Hold on, everything else can wait. Rock your baby. So I settled back into the chair and rocked her. I sang to her, savored the smell of her hair and the sweet way she nuzzles into my neck like the space was heaven made for her sweet face. My oldest child is now 7. I don’t remember that last time I rocked him, when I had my last sweet baby kiss or changed his last diaper. That time is gone and I don’t remember. So I find that I hold onto my last baby a little longer. I hold her more, rock her more and don’t feel the rush for each stage to end so things get easier. My days with 3 kids are hectic to say the least, I am counting down the hours until bedtime some nights, wishing for school to start or their dad to get home. I made a comment about it on Facebook yesterday, wishing the summer over and my boy’s back in school. My sister gave me a reality check. My niece who is in her 20’s is moving on, moving, some place not by her mommy, life has swooped her up for an adventure and she is spreading her wings and welcoming the adventure and challenge. I know my sister is happy for her and this is what she has raised and prepared her for but to have one more night to rock that baby would be priceless. Does she clearly remember the last night she let her rock her to bed, the smell of that sweet baby hair? Yes my kids make me crazy and I don’t feel like a get a chance to breath and there is always someone nipping at my heels for something but this time is going to be gone. In a blink, gone. I know it is cliché, we all know they are only little once blah blah blah. When was the last time that you really savored it. Stopped caring if the dishes were done, the beds made or the floors were clean and just savored the moments of your child’s day, their time with you? I have to make myself slow down, really be aware and say, stop, stop cleaning, stop running errands and sit down and play, play LEGOS again, dress the same doll for the 10th time today because some day there will be no LEGOS to build with and no dolls to dress. I hope you that when you sit down to play with your kids, put them to bed or help them tie their shoes, you will savor that moment. No matter how tired you are, how annoying they may have been an hour ago or how sick and tired you are of the fighting the kids have been doing, make an effort at some point during the day to savor a moment. No matter how small, savor a sweet moment it may be the last time they will need you to tie their shoes, tuck them in or want a kiss goodbye in front of their friends and when that last time is gone, you don’t get it back.
Posted by Crazed Mama at 9:23 PM